Before you can head off on the perfect honeymoon, you have to figure out how to get married in Los Angeles (LA). You need to apply for your LA marriage license before your wedding if you want to have everything done in time. With a few simple steps and the right documents, you can make sure you have everything ready before your big day. How to Get a Marriage License in Los Angeles, CA The Los Angeles County Registrar-Recorder/County Clerk (RR/CC) is in charge of helping couples who are getting married in Los Angeles. Other than providing licenses, the LA County RR/CC can also perform a civil ceremony for an added fee. After you get your marriage license, you have to take part in a qualified ceremony. Then, the Los Angeles County marriage license automatically becomes a marriage certificate. You just have to return it to the RR/CC in order to get it officially recorded. It is important to keep in mind that you have to return the LA marriage license if you want to actually be married. You also have to take part in an actual religious or civil ceremony. To be officially married, you must file for a license, take part in a ceremony and return the license to the RR/CC to be recorded. Getting Started To get your marriage license in Los Angeles, you and your spouse must be present at the RR/CC together. You must show some kind of proof of your age and identity. Your proof of identity must include a photo. In addition, your documents must be submitted in English or contain an English translation from a certified translator. Obviously, you and your partner must be currently unmarried in order to get married in Los Angeles County. Even if you have already applied for a divorce, your previous marriage is still in effect until the actual date of dissolution. If the divorce occurred in the last two years, you will need to show written proof that the divorce occurred. Applying for Your Marriage License If you want a Los Angeles County marriage license, you need to first fill out this form. You can get a regular marriage license for $91. The LA marriage license is valid for 90 days from the day you get it, so you have to use it within this time frame or apply for another one. In addition, the marriage license is only valid within the state's borders. It is also possible to get a confidential marriage license for $85. While a standard marriage license can be found by any search of the county's records, a confidential license is not a public record. This option is only available for couples who have already been living together as spouses. Where to Go There are several places where you can go to get your marriage license in Los Angeles. The county deliberately spreads out different offices around the area so that it is easier to get married in Los Angeles County. If you want to get your marriage license, you can check out one of the following locations. To go to the Norwalk location, head to 12400 Imperial Highway. The office is placed within Room 1002.For the Los Angeles office, visit 4716 E. Cesar E. Chavez Ave.To find the Lancaster office, go to 1028 W. Avenue J2.In Avalon, you can get a marriage license within the Catalina Branch Court.For Beverly Hills residents, a marriage license can be purchased at 9355 Burton Way.In Van Nuys, you can get a license at 14340 W. Sylvan Street.At the Los Angeles International Airport, you can get a marriage license on the sixth floor.Florence Firestone offers marriage licenses in Room 102 at 7807 S. Compton Ave. What to Bring Once you figure out where to get married in Los Angeles, the next step is making sure you bring everything that you need. Other than filling out the correct form, you also need to bring proof of your identity. This identification needs to include a photograph and your age. You can use a California identification, driver's license, alien resident card or passport. If you have a certified baptismal record or birth certificate from a government agency that has a picture on it, you can also use that option as well. People who are under the age of 18 must get a notarized consent statement from their parent or guardian. They also need a Superior Court Order that gives them permission to get married. Both of these tasks must be completed before a minor can receive a marriage license. Other than being unmarried, you must pay the public marriage license fee. If you want the county to hold a civil ceremony for you, you must pay an additional $35 fee. Unlike other parts of the country, you do not need a health certificate or blood test in order to get married. As long as you have the right identification, you do not have to worry about your citizenship or residency status. You can pay for your licensing fees with a money order, cash, check, credit card or debit card. Los Angeles Marriage License and Ceremony Fees Public Marriage License $91 Confidential Marriage License $85 Civil Ceremony $35 RR/CC-Provided Witness for a Civil Ceremony $20 Deputy Commissioner for a Day Program $75 Next Steps Everyone who is getting married in Los Angeles has to have a marriage license. Once you have your LA marriage license, your next step is figuring out where you want to go to get married. You still have a wedding to plan out, so you need to figure out the details. Before you can be officially married, you must hold a ceremony. Then, you have to return your license to the RR/CC for it to get recorded. Tips for Getting Your Marriage License in LA You can quickly learn about how to get married in Los Angeles through the RR/CC office. One of the best things you can do is get your marriage license early. As your big day approaches, you will be busy preparing the food and decorations for your wedding. You have 90 days to get married after you receive your license, so you will have plenty of time to hold your ceremony and file your LA marriage license with the county. Helpful Resources: L.A. County RR/CCMarriage License ApplicationOffice Locations for Marriage Licenses and CeremoniesRecording Your Marriage CertificateChanging Your Name in California
By admin
February 13, 2020
L.A. Banquets, the premier provider of the most successful and beautiful wedding, banquet and event sites in the Los Angeles Area, is proud to announce the latest jewel in our crown: The Landmark in Mission Hills! If you are planning your event of a lifetime for September of 2019 or later, this spectacular venue will be available to host as many as 850 guests. Discerning brides and grooms, corporate logistics specialists, celebrities and party planners have been counting on L.A. Banquets for the past 30 years for everything from small gatherings to sparkling celebrity and wedding galas. Each of our 10 other locations boasts its own unique charm, grandeur and atmosphere. They include: Glenoaks Banquet Hall in Glendale, CA; Brandview Ballroom in Los Angeles, CA; Legacy Banquet Hall in Glendale, CA; Le Foyer Ballroom in North Hollywood, CA; Patio at Brandview in Los Angeles, CA; Le Foyer Lounge in North Hollywood, CA; Legacy Lounge (under construction) in Glendale, CA. We are thrilled to now also bring our unparalleled quality and vision to Mission Hills. Developing the plans for this soon-to-be Mission Hills fixture has been the passion of our dedicated staff, and at last we are ready to share the exciting details about the venue that will forever change the events landscape in this city. In order to give The Landmark the introductory fanfare it deserves and to unveil its new name, we invited acclaimed Armenian-American DJ and celebrity Super Sako to view the site, which is still under construction, and to introduce it to you. When this venue opens its doors, Southern Californians seeking a party and event location for their weddings, banquets, bar or bat mitzvahs, quinceañeras, retirements or other celebrations will be dazzled by all that this space has to offer: Accommodates up to 850 guests; 10,000 sq. ft. ballroom; 3,000 sq. ft. foyer; Self-parking and valet service; Bridal suite; Groom’s suite; 25-foot ceilings; Modern design that features the latest lighting and technology; Outdoor ceremony space and garden. As with all L.A. Banquets spaces, we can totally tailor elements such as the lighting and the layout, modifying them to enhance the ambiance you want to create for your meal and reception. Imagine your guests enjoying a delicious gourmet meal and being serenaded by a chamber orchestra one minute and then being transported to the vibrant thump of the bass and the swirling and pulsating lights of a trend-setting London dance club the next. L.A. Banquets can dazzle and delight you and your guests, creating the perfectly customized atmosphere for any mood and occasion. The Landmark is the brainchild of the same successful wedding, banquet and party planning pioneers who are already famous for establishing a tradition of excellence and premium quality throughout the Los Angeles, Glendale and North Hollywood areas. With our award-winning catering and on-point venue coordinators by your side to assist with every aspect of the planning process, we will help you to transform your vision into special memories that will last a lifetime and be the talk of your guests for years to come. WHY YOU SHOULD LOOK NO FURTHER THAN L.A. BANQUETS Whether you are planning an intimate outdoor gathering under the stars or a glittering celebrity gala that will be the buzz of the social season, L.A. Banquets has the expertise and experience to make every detail of your special day flawless. As a team of veteran wedding and event coordinators, no task is too small or too extravagant for us to take on. Making your day live up to your happiest dream is our mission. Our new Mission Hills events venue, with its stunning architecture and luxurious amenities, will provide the perfect backdrop for some of the area’s most breath-taking and talked-about weddings, balls, banquets and parties. We’re so excited about the unique niche this venue will fill that we are crafting a one-of-a-kind, upgraded signature menu that is sure to add yet another touch of refinement and class to your once-in-a-lifetime day. We have spent years planning and lavishing this location with our careful personal attention. Now, the time has come for you to see it for yourself. Beginning next week, we invite you to schedule an appointment for a hard hat tour of our facility. As you stroll through the construction site, you will see the foundations of the breathtaking venue that will literally be taking shape before your eyes over the next few months. We know you will be just as entranced by the stunning beauty of this amazing location as we are. That’s why we will also begin accepting reservations next week for events taking place in September of 2019 and beyond. If you are among the first 30 guests to make a reservation, you will receive special promotional pricing. Whether you want to oversee every detail of your celebration and bring in your own caterers and musicians or let our consummate professional wedding planners devote loving care and attention to every facet, L.A. Banquets is your unparalleled, one-stop event planning partner. Schedule a hard hat tour appointment to see The most exciting convention and party spot in Mission Hills. Let us show you how we can transform your dreams into a reality that far exceeds even your highest expectations.
By admin
October 16, 2018
What should you consider when picking a date to get engaged or married? There are many popular dates to choose from, but you also need to be aware of when to avoid scheduling a wedding. Use this guide to find the perfect dates for the most special days of your life. How to Pick a Significant Engagement or Wedding Date Engagement dates may be picked spontaneously by your groom-to-be or based on previous discussions you’ve had. Some couples choose to go shopping for a ring together so that they can find just the right one, but others prefer the traditional route with the entire proposal being a surprise. Although there are many common days to propose, the choice should be based on the type of relationship you share and what date has the most significance for you. You and your future groom should have a deep enough connection for him to know the best day to pop the question, but if you’re not sure whether he’s been paying attention, make time to talk about the important days or times in your life to give him an idea of what you would consider the most romantic moment. According to the event organizing company Chillisauce, many women think the anniversary of the day they met their future groom is the best day to get engaged. The time of year you’d like to get married and the length of time both of you believe in being engaged before having the wedding are also important in timing your engagement. If you and your significant other have discussed marriage, you may already have picked out an ideal month or season and can base the date of your engagement on your preferred wedding date. However, most couples give themselves a little downtime after getting engaged before diving headfirst into wedding planning. It’s important to have some breathing room and time to enjoy your engagement prior to the craziness of putting together all the elements of your big celebration. Picking a date for your wedding day is just the beginning, and planning will become more intensive as the ceremony draws closer. When you’re ready to pick a date, consider these six ways to settle on just the right time to get married. Traditional Days Some cultures and religious practices favor specific days for marriage based on traditions and beliefs. For example, Jewish couples may choose to be married on Tuesday because the book of Genesis mentions “God saw it was good” twice when describing the third day of the week. Irish tradition views New Year’s Eve as a lucky day for weddings so that bride and groom can start the new year off as an official couple. If you and your spouse have a day of religious or cultural significance on which you’d like to get married, you might wish to add a little bit of information about your choice to the wedding program to let guests know why you consider it to be special. Choosing a date based on cultural tradition opens the door for adding fun and unique elements relating to this tradition to your ceremony and reception. Seasonal Each season has its own palette of colors and collection of flowers, and this can influence when you decide to hold your ceremony. Matching your desired wedding colors to the appropriate season means floral décor is less expensive and makes it easier for everyone to find appropriate attire. The light pastels of spring, bold and bright hues of summer, rugged natural fall shades and rich colors of winter all make beautiful wedding themes. Pick the combination you like best, and plan your wedding day accordingly. Honeymoon Dreams Have you and your fiancé been dreaming about the perfect honeymoon? Pick a date for your wedding in the right season for you to be able to enjoy the best weather in your chosen destination. Even if it means getting married in the dead of winter so that you can experience the height of summer in your honeymoon spot, it’s a trade off you won’t regret. Family Schedules The last thing you want is to plan your whole wedding and have the most important people in your life miss out because of a scheduling conflict or complications with travel. As you consider when to get married, talk with the prominent people in your wedding party to find out which dates are out of the question and which ones are best for them to be able to attend. Consider the potential burden of travel on elderly or disabled family members, and avoid picking a time of year when travel volume is high. Geek Holidays If you and your groom-to-be are into a specific fandom, it’s perfectly fine to pick a significant day from your fictitious universe of choice on which to hold your ceremony. Whether it’s Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter or Doctor Who, this is your chance to go all out with a “big fat geek wedding.” May 25, also known as Geek Pride Day, may be best for couples who can’t choose just one geeky theme. Personal Significance Choosing a day with special meaning for you and your fiancé will give you double the reason to celebrate when your anniversary comes around every year. You may wish to hold your wedding on the same day you first met, went on your first date, got engaged or of any other event you wish to commemorate. Making Your Wedding a Day to Remember Once you and your fiancé settle on a date for your wedding, it’s time to start planning an unforgettable celebration. Your wedding should be a day you treasure for the rest of your life, so don’t feel restricted by traditions or pressured to follow a specific format. Use these suggestions from wedding planners, popular wedding websites and other couples as inspiration for your own perfect day. Personal Touches Put a spin on the style of your wedding program to make it one of a kind. Instead simply listing the order of events for the ceremony, consider adding a few interesting facts about you and your groom and putting in some pizzazz with fun illustrations. If your guests have a sense of humor, you can turn the program into a silly “survival guide” with step-by-step instructions on how to “make it through” the ceremony unscathed. As for attire, go ahead and wear whatever you want. Apart from observing common decency, there’s no right or wrong way to dress for your wedding. Let guests know in your invitations if you prefer them to follow a non-traditional dress code, or keep your distinctive outfits a secret so that you make an eye-catching statement as you come down the aisle. Making Guests Feel Comfortable Wedding receptions can last for a long time, especially if guests haven’t seen each other in a while or everyone gets caught up with dancing. It can be a lot for older friends and family members to handle, and even younger members of the wedding party are sure to want the chance to get off their feet for a while. Putting together a cozy “lounge” in a quiet part of the venue creates the perfect place for guests to rest or hang out when they need a break. Fun for Everyone What’s an outdoor wedding without a few games? Giant yard Jenga, bocce ball, ring toss games, badminton and even giant checkers are all a lot of fun to have at your reception. If you’re feeling especially creative, plan a scavenger hunt with a list of common items to be collected and prizes for guests who are able to amass the largest assortment. If you want to put together a unique and memorable album of photos in addition to those taken by your wedding photographer, build a DIY photo booth with fun accessories for guests to play around with as they snap photos of each other or take wedding selfies. Don’t forget to display a custom hashtag for your wedding on a sign nearby so that you can easily find all the pictures on Facebook and Instagram later on. Music with Meaning With streaming music services like Spotify and Apple Music, you can create a customized playlist to take you all the way from the ceremonial walk down the aisle to the last dance at the reception. Some services allow multiple users to collaborate on playlists, so everyone in the wedding party can add songs with special meaning. When the big day is over, you can listen to the saved play list again any time you want and relive the memories of the day. Going Full Geek Geek weddings are popular enough to have their own category on Etsy and full collections of related pins on Pinterest, so you’ll have no shortage of places from which to draw inspiration if you have your heart set on a ceremony based on your favorite fandom. Be clear about your intentions when inviting guests, including any specific color schemes you’d like to maintain for the dress code at the wedding. Use the colors of your fandom as the theme for your celebration, and don’t hesitate to get detailed with decorations. Couples have gotten married in front of models of the TARDIS, said “I do” in full costume and decked out their cakes in designs straight out of Game of Thrones. Everything from invitations and programs to food and drink is fair game to receive a geek makeover. If your friends and family members are as into geek culture as you are, it can be fun to incorporate elements from your chosen TV show, movie or book series into the entertainment at the reception. Lightsaber fights, wand duels and even live action role playing (LARPing) all make for an unforgettable day. The Best Engagement Date for a Memorable Proposal A large number of proposals take place around the holidays. Christmas Eve and Christmas Day are the two most popular days for future grooms to pop the question, although some can’t wait that long and choose to propose one or two weekends beforehand. The Christmas season is a special time of year with almost magical qualities as everyone gets ready for festive celebrations and family gatherings. Adding a marriage proposal to the mix makes the day even more special and gives couples a little something extra to celebrate. New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day are also popular times for proposals. Instead of exchanging a kiss as the clock strikes midnight, many men decide to use the moment to pop the question. The festivity and the promise of a fresh start in the new year make the perfect atmosphere for an engagement date. Not surprisingly, another top day for getting engaged is Valentine’s Day. There’s something iconic about your significant other showing up with a box of chocolates, a bouquet of flowers and a special little box with a symbol of your future life together nestled inside. While this might be a little cliché for some, many women consider Valentine’s Day one of the most romantic times for proposals. Getting engaged on the Fourth of July gives you an excuse to celebrate a little extra every year as you gather with family for a big summer party and watch fireworks. If you and your significant other prefer long summer days to the chill of winter and would rather keep personal celebrations separate from those of significant religious holidays, Independence Day may be the perfect time for him to propose. The Most Popular Dates for Weddings (and Why) According to The Knot, these are the most popular dates for weddings in 2018: May 19, 2018 June 2, 2018 June 16, 2018 June 23, 2018 August 18, 2018 September 15, 2018 September 22, 2018 October 6, 2018 October 13, 2018 October 20, 2018 No specific reasons for the popularity of these dates were given by The Knot, but it’s easy to see none of them are during the coldest or wettest months of the year, and few fall within what is often the hottest part of summer. This minimizes the risk of travel plans being interrupted by weather and helps ensure optimal conditions for couples choosing to hold outdoor ceremonies or receptions. August 18 stands out as an exception, but its popularity is based on the way the date appears when written out. Not only do the numbers in 8/18/18 repeat, but they’re also a palindrome, meaning they read the same backwards and forwards. Both repeating numbers and palindromic dates are popular for weddings because of their unique and memorable nature. The problem with choosing dates on which the majority of couples wish to get married is the uncertainty of being able to secure your chosen venue and enough accommodations for guests. If you have your heart set on a distinctive calendar date, it’s best to start planning well in advance and to have another date in mind just in case your plans don’t work out. When You Should Never Hold a Wedding (and Why Not) There are several days and times of year you can cross off your list of potential wedding dates right at the start of planning. Knowing what days to avoid can prevent problems with budgeting, arguments with family members and accidental offenses and helps ensure everyone can travel to your wedding with ease. Superstitious Days Superstition may be defined as “a widely held but unjustified belief in supernatural causation leading to certain consequences,” but some couples prefer to avoid getting married on dates like Friday the thirteenth anyway. In some cultures, the first day of November is associated with death and is considered a bad time for marriages. You probably also want to skip April Fool’s Day if you know your friends and family members can’t help themselves when it comes to pranks. Solemn Memorials The last thing you want is to schedule your wedding the same day on which something sad or tragic happened in history or in your family. Getting married on one of these days won’t turn the tough memories into good ones, and choosing to hold your wedding on a day like September 11 or Veteran’s Day will likely upset a good number of your guests. Sports Days Whether it’s the Super Bowl, the Daytona 500 or opening day for the World Series, big days in sports are bad days to get married. Even if you’re not into the same events as your family, don’t expect the sports buffs to clear their schedules for your wedding. Make sure you know which days they’ll be glued to the TV so that you can pick a different date. However, you may want to consider whether guests who can’t set aside their sports fanaticism for one day to celebrate your marriage are worth inviting in the first place. Significant Religious or Cultural Holidays Getting engaged on Christmas may be especially romantic, but trying to get married during the holiday season is often a nightmare. Christmas, Thanksgiving the weekend of the Fourth of July and other long weekends are some of the busiest times for travel. Many people already have other plans for these dates and can’t add another trip to an already hectic season. Traveling around holidays also tends to be much more expensive than at other times of year, making it difficult for those on your guest who live far away to be able to afford to come. You should also try to schedule your ceremony away from holidays you know your family feels are important or those with great personal, religious or cultural significance. While some of these days may be considered good for weddings, others like Mother’s Day and Father’s Day are recognized as special and should be honored as such. Special Family Times Depending on the level of significance your family places on birthdays and anniversaries, it may not be a good idea to schedule your wedding on the special day of another family member. However, some families think it’s great to share important dates. In general, it’s best to plan your wedding apart from any milestone celebrations, such as a golden anniversary or when grandma is about to turn 100. You don’t want to have to compete with or juggle schedules for more than one big event when you’re already trying to handle all the details of your wedding. Other Considerations Tax time, seasons known for bad weather and any time of year during which travel and accommodations are more expensive than your guests can afford are poor choices for wedding dates. You should also consider getting married on a day other than Saturday. Since this is the most popular day of the week for couples to tie the knot, it’s also the most expensive and the most difficult day for which to book a venue and vendors. In the end, the dates on which your groom proposes and the two of you become newlyweds are personal decisions. Budget, convenience, location and the availability of significant members of the wedding party are all important, but your wedding day belongs to you and should be planned according to what you feel is special. Spend time during your engagement discussing wedding dates with your fiancé, and work together to come to a mutual decision. Don’t let small details or imagined conflicts get in the way of having your celebration on a specific date, and don’t allow pressure from family members to dictate your final choice. Once you settle on the perfect date, start planning the most unforgettable wedding you can dream up to give yourself, the wedding party and your guests a day to remember for years to come.
By admin
September 11, 2018
Tradition has created a laundry list of protocols and unwritten rules about weddings, especially when it comes to giving gifts. With everything else you have to consider after receiving a wedding invitation, the last thing you need is added stress over budgeting for, choosing and giving a gift. Decoding the Gifting Rules Presenting a happy couple with an appropriate gift should be a straightforward process, but the etiquette surrounding this practice can be surprisingly complex. After the initial excitement of receiving an invitation has passed, it’s hard not to start wondering about a million little details like: How much should you spend? What kind of gift is suitable? Do you have to get a gift for every celebration surrounding the wedding? Do you have to give a gift if you’re in the wedding party? When should you send or present the gift? These questions can be just as confusing for brides as for guests, especially when it comes to giving gifts to the bridal party. Brides wrestle with the ins and outs of building a registry and the problem of where and how to let guests know about the finished “wish list” without appearing tacky. For guests, one of the biggest struggles is budgeting for expenses related to attending the wedding and still having enough left over for gifts. Some wedding gift-giving customs are no longer thought of as taboo, and others are changing as more couples choose to get married later in life. Regional customs also affect the etiquette surrounding gifts. This guide will help you get an idea of the basic rules regarding gifting for pre-wedding celebrations and the big day. The Engagement Party The first of several celebrations, the engagement party is usually planned and hosted by the bride’s parents, but just about anyone close to the bride or groom may take the initiative. Meant to celebrate the happy couple’s future union, the party is held shortly after the announcement of the engagement and may include only guests who will be invited to the wedding or a broader group of friends, family members, acquaintances and co-workers. Do You Need to Bring a Gift? In general, couples shouldn’t expect engagement party guests to bring gifts. Between the upcoming bridal shower or wedding shower and the wedding itself, it’s understandable everyone’s budgets are going to be stretched a bit thin. If you do want to give something, it’s okay to keep it small. Budget about one-quarter to one-third of what you expect to spend on the main wedding gift, or go by the rule of spending 20 percent of your total gift budget. The closer you are to the bride and groom, the better idea it is to bring a gift. Present the gift at the engagement party unless it’s something you’re afraid will get damaged. Fragile items should be shipped directly to the couple instead. Best Gifts for Engagement Parties Because the happy couple is about to be inundated with gifts from shower and wedding guests, simple is best for celebrating their engagement. Appropriate gifts include: Chocolates or other treats Cookbooks Decorative picture frames Food or beverage club subscriptions Gift cards or certificates Personalized commemorative items Wine or champagne Cash is also an acceptable engagement gift, or you can give the couple something useful to help plan their wedding. For couples who enjoy trying new things together, consider giving a certificate for a couple’s class in cooking, fitness or any other activity in which they’ve expressed interest. Although tradition has evolved to make engagement parties another potential occasion for gift-giving, some couples specifically request their engagement party guests not bring gifts. If this is the case, respect their wishes and come simply to celebrate their happiness. You shouldn’t feel obligated to spend more on top of expenses related to the wedding. Couples who do receive gifts should express thanks with notes or cards as soon as possible. The Shower Usually thrown by the maid of honor or the bridesmaids, the bridal shower occurs at least a month before the wedding date. With few exceptions, the purpose of the party is to help the bride get ready for the next phase of her life by giving practical gifts she and her groom-to-be can use to set up their home. Your Gift Budget Opinions differ regarding how much you should spend on a shower gift. Some guides break the numbers down by your relationship to the bride and suggest: $50 for acquaintances and regular guests $75 to $100 for friends, co-workers and extended family members $75 to $150 for close friends and family members Others put the numbers somewhere between $25 and $75. Regardless of suggestions, your personal budget is always the deciding factor. A general rule of thumb is to spend about 20 percent of your total gift budget on something for the shower and save the bigger spending for a wedding gift. To set a gift budget, consider your total expenses for attending the wedding, including the dress, shoes, travel and accommodations. If you’re going to the shower and not the wedding, you may be able to spend more on a gift. However, if you find yourself stretching your budget just to make it to the main ceremony, don’t feel like you have to be extravagant with what you give. Choosing a Gift Household goods are always welcome as shower gifts. Some of the most common include kitchen items, such as small appliances and utensil sets, but it’s hard to go wrong with anything domestic. Setting up a new home can be expensive, and young brides in particular appreciate receiving items they can use for years. Another nice way to show the bride-to-be you care is to gift her with a certificate for a spa day, massage, manicure or pedicure. She’s already going crazy with wedding planning, and the chance to be pampered for a little while is a welcome distraction. If you’re invited to a themed shower, make sure your gift is in line with both the theme and the bride’s personal tastes. Some brides set up registries specifically for the shower, often including smaller items than those in the wedding registry. If this is the case, it takes the guesswork out of choosing a gift. You can be sure the bride will like whatever you pick out from the registry. Wedding shower gifts are a little different because the party focuses on both the bride and groom. For this type of shower, you may want to consider giving: Cookware or bakeware sets Cookbooks for couples with accompanying kitchen accessories Items to be used at the wedding, such as a cake serving set Luxury bedding or towel sets Monogrammed bedding Personalized home décor Whether you’re invited to a shower for the bride or the couple, giving a handmade gift is appropriate if you know the guest or guests of honor very well and have been blessed with artistic, crafty or culinary skills. Proper Protocol for Giving Shower gifts are generally brought right to the celebration and opened either before or after food is served. If you can’t attend the shower but still want to show your love and support, send your gift to the hostess far enough in advance so that it arrives in time for the party. Wrap the gift in an attractive box with some kind of decorative touch, or have it gift wrapped at the store where you make your purchase. Be sure to include your full name on the “from” line, especially if you’re attending a shower with a large number of guests. Whoever hosts the shower should keep track of who gives which gifts so that the bride or couple knows to whom they should make out thank-you notes. Shower hostesses should give the bride a gift, although it doesn’t have to be anything lavish. In return for the shower, it’s considered polite for the bride to bring the hostess a gift or card expressing gratitude for all her hard work. On occasion, you may be invited to a gift-less shower. In this case, you don’t have to worry about doing anything besides showing up and celebrating the upcoming nuptials with the guest or guests of honor. The Wedding Gifts given at weddings are often the biggest and most expensive items you’ll buy for the happy couple. With the exception of destination weddings, which require spending quite a bit more on travel and accommodations than you would for a local celebration, guests are expected to bestow gifts to commemorate the union with a token of love and appreciation. What to Spend In the past, etiquette used to dictate spending at least as much as the “price per plate” of the wedding in the mistaken idea it was necessary for guests to make up for what the bride and groom were spending to have them attend. However, because wedding costs can vary widely depending on location, tradition, the couple’s budget and the growing trend toward minimalism, this rule has become outdated. Instead, The Knot recommends reserving about 60 percent of your gift budget for a wedding present. What does this look like in actual dollars? A study by American Express revealed friends of couples spend an average of $99 on wedding gifts. Family members spend around $127. A review of The Knot’s registry shows slightly lower spending for friends at an average of $79 but higher for family members, who spend closer to $146. General recommendations suggest you spend at least $50, between $75 and $100 if you’re a distant friend or co-worker and between $100 and $125 if you’re a close friend or relative. As with the bridal or wedding shower, consider how well you know the couple when budgeting for your gift. Also take into account the expenses associated with attending the wedding, including travel, hotel and food. If you can’t manage the minimum of $50, it’s acceptable to pool funds with other guests in similar situations to purchase a larger item for the bride and groom. For example, if you know they need a good dining room set or a washer and dryer, get in touch with other guests to find out who’s willing to go in on such a purchase. This way, you can give the couple a practical gift they’ll appreciate and can use for years without stretching your budget too thin. If you’re close to the couple but are unable to attend, it’s considered good manners to send a gift. Distant relatives and acquaintances who can’t make it to the ceremony can send a card or small item instead of a larger present. What to Shop For Weddings are one of the easiest events to shop for because couples provide gift registries to help guests decide what to give. Registry information isn’t included on invitations but may appear on shower invitations, wedding websites or “save the date” cards. All you have to do is browse the registry and pick a gift you can afford. Start shopping early to avoid being left with only a few items from which to choose. Household goods, including bakeware sets, utensil sets and blenders, are the most common gift requests found in registries. Because couples are just starting out, these kinds of practical items make the most sense as wedding presents. If you know the couple well enough, it’s okay to go “off registry” and get them something you’re sure they’ll appreciate, but avoid novelty gifts with little or no useful function. Other acceptable gift ideas include: Luxury bedding or bath sets Gift cards from stores where the couple is registered Subscriptions to digital services, such as Amazon prime An appropriate item “of the month” club If you’re really not sure what to get, consider a cash gift. Giving cash is becoming more common, and some couples actually prefer to receive money. The average amount of a cash wedding gift is about $150, but give what you feel is appropriate for your budget and your relationship to the couple. As with the engagement party, if the couple requests guests not bring gifts, you’re not obligated to present them with anything. When to Give Unless the registry indicates otherwise, wedding presents should be shipped to the couple close to the date of the wedding. If you’re unable to send a gift on time, don’t believe the unwritten “rule” of having up to a year to give something. Make your purchase and have the item shipped no more than a couple of months after the ceremony so that the bride and groom don’t think you’ve forgotten about them. Although some traditions still hold with having a gift table at the ceremony, it’s become customary at most modern weddings for all gifts to be sent ahead. The easiest way to send a gift is to let the registry site take care of the wrapping and shipping. If the couple registers at a physical store, send the gift yourself instead of bringing it along. Shipping the gift is also preferable if you have to travel to the wedding so that you don’t have to worry about it becoming damaged during the trip. The Bridal Party What do you do about wedding gifts if you’re part of the ceremony? Bridesmaids in particular have quite a few extra expenses, including dresses, shoes, makeup and jewelry. Add travel and the cost of throwing a bridal shower, and you’re spending a significant amount of money to help your friend celebrate her big day. Should the Wedding Party Give Gifts? Despite the hit to your bank account, etiquette does dictate members of the wedding party should give gifts to the happy couple. However, you shouldn’t be expected to spend as much as guests who have fewer expenses. Take time to budget beforehand to ensure you have enough to cover a gift for the engagement party, the shower and the wedding. Browse the wedding registry as early as possible to find a smaller item you can afford, or talk with other members of the wedding party about the possibility of purchasing a larger gift as a group. Focus your search on personal gifts with special meaning for the couple. The intent should be to show how much you care about and how happy you are for the bride and groom. What Should Brides Give the Bridal Party? Brides ask a lot of the members of their wedding parties. From the start of the planning process right up to the end of the reception, every special woman and girl gives her all to make the day unforgettable. It’s only right to show appreciation with a meaningful gift. Since the bride usually knows the members of her wedding party well, it shouldn’t be difficult to choose items they’ll like, appreciate and use for years to come. Some brides give gifts like shoes or accessories meant to be worn in the wedding, but this should only be done if the items can be worn again for other occasions. Giving something a bridesmaid will wear once and then stuff in the back of her closet fails to express proper appreciation and may even be seen as selfish. It’s more appropriate to give: Gift cards Monogrammed personal items Handmade gifts Gifts should be something easy to transport for those members of the wedding party who have to travel and suitable according to age and the closeness of their relationship to the bride. Even the flower girl should get a gift, preferably something she’s been hinting she wants or a special item she can treasure for the rest of her life. How Much Should Wedding Party Gifts Cost? Gifts given to bridesmaids should cost approximately the same amount to avoid perceived favoritism. However, brides usually spend more on the maid or matron of honor to acknowledge the extra time and effort she put into making the wedding go off without a hitch. Serving as the right-hand woman to the bride takes a lot of time and energy, and gifts should reflect the bride’s gratitude for all the help. Although $75 to $150 is a good average price range for wedding party gifts, it’s also important to consider how much each person spent and how much is available in the total wedding budget. Planning for these gifts in advance ensures enough money is available to honor these special ladies. When Should Gifts Be Given to the Wedding Party? Bridesmaids generally receive their gifts at the rehearsal dinner or at lunch on the day of the wedding. It can also be fun to hand out gifts while everyone is getting ready and excitement is running high. Such timing is especially appropriate if the gifts are meant to be worn during the wedding. Some brides prefer to schedule a separate time to give gifts to their bridesmaids apart from the rush of wedding planning and preparations. The most important thing to remember as you consider the protocols for wedding gift-giving is nobody is ever obligated to give a gift at any point. Giving gifts is a tradition in and of itself, and it’s an act meant to express how much you care for the couple and show your support for their union. Stretching beyond your budget, driving yourself crazy trying to find the “perfect” item and stressing out over the best time to send gifts turns the entire process into drudgery. If you need one rule to follow to make gift-giving easier the next time you’re invited to a wedding, stick with doing what’s most appropriate for the situation. This will differ depending on how well you know the couple, how long you’ve been friends or how closely you’re related. Family and local customs may also come into play. Don’t pressure yourself by worrying your gift won’t be as elaborate or expensive as those given by others. What ultimately counts is the thought and care you put into the gifts you give.
Wedding checklists include big decisions like choosing a venue, finding a photographer and getting the right music, but did you know planning your wedding is much easier when you take care of small details first? Having a “checklist before the checklist” to complete one to two years before your wedding lays the foundation for successful planning so that you can avoid problems later on. Start with these 11 steps to ease the stress of planning. Announce Your Engagement You’re newly engaged and giddy with excitement over the prospect of spending the rest of your life with the person you love most. Take time to enjoy the glow before you start diving into the details of the wedding. You may wish to invite friends and family to share in your happiness by throwing an engagement party. Not all couples do this because of the added work of planning, but it can be fun to celebrate this milestone with the most important people in your life. Whether or not you decide to throw a party, make sure to announce your engagement. You can send out cards or postcards, put a notice in the local paper or create a wedding website and share the link. Don’t forget to have some professional engagement photos taken at your favorite photo studio. These are great for sharing on your website, adding to a slideshow at your wedding and putting in photo albums to preserve for the future. Don’t just post about your engagement on Facebook or snap a few smartphone photos to share on Instagram. You’re about to embark on the greatest journey of your life, and you should treat it like the amazing event it is instead of just another status update. Pick Your Style and Theme Discussing the level of formality you’d like at your wedding and the theme you envision early in the planning process gives you and your fiancé a chance to work out differences and make appropriate compromises. This is the point at which you’re likely to discover unusual details regarding each other’s tastes, and it’s a good time to learn how to resolve the kinds of conflicts couples typically face when planning their weddings. You have a range of choices when it comes to how formal you want your wedding to be: Casual allows for comfort while keeping attire classy Semi-formal falls between casual and formal Black tie optional puts you and the wedding party in formal attire but gives guests freedom to dress more comfortably Black tie requests all guests dress in formal attire White tie is the most formal of all, requiring full-length gowns for women and long-tail tuxedos for men This stage is also a good time to decide whether you’d like to have a sit-down meal, a buffet or just a spread of appetizers and whether or not there will be a cocktail hour or open bar. Knowing these details helps you create a budget and makes it easier to pick a caterer. For your theme, feel free to go a little crazy looking through wedding magazines, browsing Pinterest, checking out ideas on Instagram and surfing wedding websites. Look for elements you love, saving the best to refer back to later. You likely already have an idea of what colors you want to focus on, and looking for inspiration clarifies your vision. Remember to base your style and theme choices on your tastes and your fiancé’s, not what you think your families are expecting. It’s your wedding day, and it’s important for you to enjoy it. Map Out a Budget Many couples make the mistake of trying to tackle the larger items on a wedding checklist without knowing exactly how much money they should allocate to each. Avoid financial concerns later on by sitting down with your fiancé, your parents and his parents to lay out an official budget. First, determine who is paying for which elements of the wedding or what amount of money each person is contributing, including what you and your fiancé have available to spend. Write everything down, and make sure you get a clear commitment from all parties. Once you know your total budget, you can begin to allot funds based on your priorities. Most couples spend around half their budgets on the reception, so decide which elements of the celebration are most important to you. Are you dreaming of fancy floral arrangements? Is there a particular caterer you just have to hire despite the high price tag? Photography is another element on which it’s common to splurge, especially because wedding photos are meant to be treasured for generations. You also need to be able to afford a venue with the right layout and enough space to pull off your theme. Whatever way you decide to allocate your money, make sure you have a little extra set aside to cover unexpected expenses. If you have trouble making these kinds of decisions or start feeling overwhelmed at this stage, you may wish to hire a wedding planner. These professionals bring objective opinions, years of experience and useful vendor and venue connections to your planning process. Make Wedding Party and Guest Lists Brides often feel guilty when it comes time to choose who will stand by them during the ceremony and who will be there to share in the festivities. It’s tempting to invite everyone you can think of to avoid potential hurt feelings, but your budget can only support so many guests. The process may be easier if you start with the wedding party. Think of the people who have stuck by you through thick and thin. These are the people you want helping you during the planning process and supporting you on the big day. Maybe you already promised your best friend she could be your maid of honor, or you have a group of friends you’ve known since high school who would make perfect bridesmaids. Make this list first before tackling the full guest list. To determine how many people you can put on your list, subtract the members of the wedding party from the maximum number of guests for which your budget allows. It’s okay to start out writing down everyone you want to have at the wedding and shorten the list later, but you have to stay within your limit regardless of how you approach the process. Writing out your list also helps you and your fiancé visualize potential conflicts between family members, making it easier to decide who you shouldn’t invite. Your final list gives you an expected headcount for the celebration, and you’ll need this number when researching venues and caterers. Choose a Planning App Some couples still make binders to keep track of wedding checklist details, but you can free yourself from hauling around a growing time by signing up for a wedding planning app instead. Apps like LadyMarry, Joy and Appy Couple organize every detail of your wedding in a user-friendly platform you can access from the web or any mobile device. Using an app to plan your wedding allows you to: Create and manage your full checklist Design a special wedding website Look up, compare prices from and connect with vendors Sign up for and manage your gift registry Stay on budget by storing photos of receipts Browse wedding tips and ideas Snap and store photos for theme and décor inspiration Easily share your ideas and vision with a wedding planner Create a network of friends, family, wedding party members and guests Delegate duties by adding other people as administrators Collect RSVPs Coordinate travel plans Connect with social media platforms so that guests can share photos and videos Best of all, you never have to worry about losing any of your wedding information. It’s all available right at your fingertips in the app whenever you need it during the planning process. If you really love the idea of friends and family collaborating to help you capture and preserve memories from the big day, consider creating a special hashtag to use on social media. Have everyone tag their posts and photos so that you can easily view the entire collection of contributions instead of trying to pick them out as you scroll through your feed. Consider the Date You can pick a specific date for the wedding ceremony before looking for venues or choose a time of year or range of dates to allow more freedom in choosing a location for your celebration. If you have a date in mind with special significance to you and your fiancé, it’s okay to set the date in advance and plan around it. If you’re not sure when you want to schedule the wedding, consider whether you could pull off your desired theme any time of year or if you need a specific season for it to work. You can’t get married in your backyard or on a beach in the middle of the winter, for example, and a formal ball requiring everyone to be dressed in floor-length gowns may be uncomfortable in hot summer weather. Also consider what time of day you want to get married. Most couples have evening ceremonies with some kind of dinner at the reception, but it’s also acceptable to have the wedding in the morning and serve a brunch or lunch spread instead. Whether you settle on a date before or after you get your venue, announce your choices by sending “save the date” cards to guests or pointing them to your wedding website. This lets everyone know the day of the celebration well in advance so that they can make any necessary schedule changes or travel plans. Find a Wedding Planner By this stage of the planning process, you may realize there are more details involved in putting together the wedding of your dreams than you first expected. During the initial period of engaged bliss, it’s easy to imagine pulling off the perfect wedding. However, a perfect day doesn’t happen on its own, and you’ll need to make even bigger decisions once you’re done pre-planning and you get started on the official checklist. This is where hiring a wedding planner can help. Although it requires an extra investment, it takes the pressure off you and your fiancé as you work out smaller details. Wedding planners have been putting together weddings for years and can offer guidance whenever you feel overwhelmed. They also have relationships with vendors and know who can provide the best quality service to make your ceremony just as you imagine it. You may even wind up saving money in the end thanks to discounts, package deals and budgeting tricks you wouldn’t have discovered on your own. To hire just the right person to help you plan, you need to: Find someone who will work within your budget Partner with someone who shares your vision and accommodates your tastes Look for planners with diverse, professional portfolios Ensure you’ll be allowed flexibility in vendor and venue choices Know you can rely on your planner to handle emergencies with a level head When your planner meets these requirements, you can relax knowing you have someone on whom you can rely to take care of details you don’t have the time or expertise to handle. Decide on the Type of Ceremony The biggest decision you have to make about the actual ceremony is whether you want it to be religious or civil. Although religious ceremonies are long-held traditions, more weddings are being conducted outside of religious institutions than ever before. This doesn’t mean you have to have your ceremony at a church if you want your pastor or your fiancé’s priest to preside; you’re free to choose the location independent of the ceremonies style. Just like when you choose your theme, remember you need to be comfortable with your wedding ceremony. Discuss the options with your fiancé, and decide on who you’d like to officiate. Contact and book the officiant for your chosen date as soon as you can to ensure availability. You should also find out what legal and religious requirements need to be met before getting married, such as acquiring a marriage license, attending marriage classes or going to premarital counseling sessions. If you’re not getting married in the same venue where the reception will be held, now is the time to decide where you’d like the wedding ceremony to take place. Has your dream always been to get married on a beach? Would you like to say your vows in the same place where your fiancé proposed? Choose whatever spot you feel is the “perfect” one, and don’t forget to consider any traditions you’d like to incorporate into your wedding. Make sure your ceremony venue can accommodate the special religious and personal traditions you feel will make your wedding complete. Create Your Gift Registry Experienced wedding planners recommend taking care of your gift registry seven to nine months before your wedding or in time to coincide with your bridal shower. You can register with a few of your favorite stores and websites or use a registry app to create a custom registry from a variety of sources. If you’ve chosen to plan your wedding with a full-featured planning app, it should provide a way to set up and manage your registry without requiring a separate platform. Keep your registry realistic by sitting down with your fiancé and making a list of items you know you need, will use and can reasonably fit in your living space. Include items at various price points so that your guests are able to choose gifts without feeling pressured to purchase luxury items. Don’t be shy about creating an extensive registry; providing more choices makes it easier for guests to shop and ensures your registry won’t sell out before the ceremony. Once you and your fiancé have finalized your list and registered with your chosen retailers, take advantage of technology to tactfully share the registry. Add it to your wedding website so that guests can shop at their leisure, or let people know they can see the registry through your wedding app. It’s also appropriate to share your registry in bridal shower invitations; however, you should never include registry information on invitations to the wedding. Look for the Perfect Outfits You, your groom and your wedding party all need just the right outfits for the big day. Since you’ve already chosen your theme and have spent time looking through bridal resources for inspiration, you probably have several ideas for colors and styles. If not, take a look at the colors in your theme to see which ones are the most appropriate for dresses. Try to choose colors flattering to your bridesmaids and suitable for wearing to other events. Dresses are big investments, and the members of your wedding party are more likely to be amenable to spending the money if they know they’ll be able to wear the outfit more than once. For your own dress, get familiar with the styles available and the current trends. Visit several bridal stores and websites to see what’s available, and don’t be afraid to try something different than what you originally envisioned. Remember to leave room in your budget for customization and alterations so that you can afford the gown of your dreams. If you’re going to wear a dress passed down from a family member, plan ahead of time for adjustments, alterations or restoration. Heirloom dresses can be beautiful and unique, but don’t be surprised if you have to spend a significant amount to make the dress your mother or grandmother wore on her wedding day fit properly and harmonize with the style of the celebration. Tackle the Bigger Picture With your pre-planning out of the way, tackling the rest of your wedding to-do list shouldn’t be a hassle. There will be tough decisions to make, and you may still feel overwhelmed at times, but getting smaller details in place first means not being surprised by them later or finding yourself in an unnecessary time crunch. Use your budget, your chosen date or date range, your theme, the kind of food you want and all the other elements you already decided on as guides to help you move on in the planning process. If you didn’t settle on a venue when picking your date, start there. Some venues offer packages incorporating multiple services, and if you like what you see, it’s even less work to finish planning the wedding. For venues without added services, you’ll need to start looking into photographers, bands or DJs, caterers, florists and other vendors to handle the bigger details of the celebration. If you hired a wedding planner, ask for suggestions to narrow down your choices without spending hours researching. You want to put together a team of professionals offering high-quality service to ensure your wedding goes exactly as you envision it. Approaching wedding planning in the right order eases some of the stress brides feel as the big day draws closer and they’re faced with making serious decisions. The more you can get done before starting your official checklist, the less last-minute scrambling you’ll find yourself doing. You don’t have to worry about missing or forgetting important details, and it becomes easier to handle the more complex parts of planning. Remember to get your fiancé and the members of your wedding party involved in the planning so that the bulk of the work doesn’t fall on you. Having friends and family by your side along with your wedding planner will help you get through your pre-planning checklist, conquer venue and vendor decisions and approach your big day with joy instead of anxiety.
You want your wedding day to be perfect in every way. Among many other things, that means finding the dress of your dreams. There are many factors to consider as you go through the bridal gown selection process, and we’re here to untangle all of the many threads. Buying vs. Renting Your Dress Before you even start shopping, one question to contemplate is whether you want to purchase your own wedding dress that you can keep forever or if you would prefer to rent or borrow one for the day. The upside to purchasing is that you will have an everlasting memento of your special day that goes beyond your memories and your videos and pictures. The gown will be yours and yours alone on your wedding day; no one will have worn it before you do. In years to come, you might even wear the dress again when renewing your vows, or you might one day pass it down to your daughter or another family member as an heirloom for her own ceremony. On the other hand, many brides-to-be are electing to borrow or rent their wedding dresses. For one thing, doing so is practical as well as being a lot cheaper. If you’re not sentimental and don’t have much of a desire to pay to preserve your dress for posterity or wear it again yourself, these solutions can be quite appealing. Your pocketbook might thank you as well since you can expect to pay anywhere from $500 to $50,000 for a new dress. For brides with designer tastes and a tight budget, renting can allow them the leeway to have a brand-name frock, often at half the cost. In short, rental wedding dresses can provide a way for ladies on a budget to live their dreams of dressing and being treated like the most glamorous of celebrities when they walk down the aisle. You might be worried that a rental dress will not fit properly or might be lacking in other ways. Rest assured that reputable wedding stores make it a priority that their rental bridal gowns and bridesmaid’s dresses are thoroughly cleaned and inspected before being dispensed to the next bride. Furthermore, alterations are often included in the price, which might make it possible to stretch your budget a bit further and pay for another wedding upgrade or extra you have been pining for. Ultimately, only the bride can answer the question of whether to buy or rent. Do what feels right and what fits your budget, and don’t let your preconceptions or the opinions of others sway you from your goal of making your day exactly what you want it to be. Before You Go Shopping Doing your homework before you ever walk into a store will go a long way toward reducing your stress and helping you to determine exactly what you want. That means giving yourself time, at least six months before your big day, to think and browse, discuss and ponder your choices. This freedom also gives you the space to learn the vocabulary of wedding dresses. These are the words you will be speaking with your consultant as well as all of the salespeople who will be giving you gowns to try on. We’re talking about understanding the various styles of sleeves, necklines, silhouettes, train lengths and so much more. Only then can you begin to actually form the clear and strong opinions about your preferences that will guide you in the final selection process. Another wise idea is to get accurate measurements of your size before you go to the stores. Many brides-to-be are unaware that wedding dress sizes are often different from standard ones. Having precise measurements can also give you exact guidelines when speaking to store clerks, often before you even go. When setting up an appointment with a retailer you have never met before, be sure to ask if they carry a selection of dresses in your size. If they don’t, you will save yourself the time and trouble of going on a wasted trip. Selecting Online and Physical Wedding Stores No matter how small or large your budget may be, it’s safe to say that your wedding dress is one of the most important purchases you will ever make. For that reason, it’s smart to invest some of your time into finding shops you will feel good about patronizing. One of your best tools is personal recommendations. Ask friends and family for their favorite shops, and consult online review websites as well. For brick-and-mortar retailers, call ahead and ask some general questions. If the associate with whom you spoke seems friendly and helpful, it’s a good sign that the in-store customer service will also be of high quality. Online stores offer convenience and variety, but exercise caution before you buy. Make sure that the vendor is an authorized retailer and is not trying to pass off a copycat dress as the genuine designer article. Prices that appear too good to be true generally are, and the last thing you need as your big day approaches is the anguish of receiving a product that is not what was advertised online. Before you buy, verify with the dress manufacturer that the site is a reputable and authorized dealer. Also, don’t buy a dress from the internet unless you can return or exchange it if it does not fit properly. Remember, you usually do get what you pay for. How to Enhance Your Dress Shopping Experience Now that you have done your preliminary research and found some retailers that appeal to you, the real test of patience and perseverance begins. Stay the course and remember these guidelines, and you will soon have the gown of your dreams. Make an appointment in advance. Bridal shops are frenetic places, and you want to do everything you can to ensure that you have the undivided attention of a sales associate. Even if you do preschedule, you may still find that the store is busy and the associates are harried. If possible, arrange to go on a weekday when conditions tend to be more peaceful. Don’t take too many people with you. As the saying goes, too many cooks spoil the soup. No matter how much you might love all 20 of your friends, limiting your group’s size will keep the feedback manageable. Dress for shopping success and comfort. When you shop, your job is to look as much like you normally do as possible and to be comfortable. Of course, you can and should bring your wedding shoes and shapewear if you have them as well as ideas about what you want your hair to look like, but you don’t need to get a spray tan or cake on the makeup before you go dress-hunting. Help the sales associate select possibilities by providing as much clear information as you can about your goals for the day and your color scheme. Stay focused. Remember, this is your wedding. Maintain control of your shopping appointment. That means gently but firmly stating what you want and don’t want. While the opinions of your friends, bridal party and sales associates are welcome, the decisions are ultimately yours to make. Don’t allow yourself to be bullied into spending more money than you planned or into buying something you don’t absolutely love. A Word About Fabrics Now that you’re actively shopping, one vital aspect of your dress that you need to decide on is the fabric. There are six major types that are traditionally used in bridal gowns: Satin - Smooth, thick and versatile, satin works well for all body types and lends itself to several different styles of gowns including ruched, drape and ball gown styles. Usually made of 100 percent silk, bridal gown-grade satin is especially recommended if your wedding is taking place during cooler seasons. Charmeuse - This light, glossy fabric is usually made from silk but can also be manufactured from synthetic fibers. Because of the liquid effect it gives, charmeuse is used for column-style dresses. Keep in mind that, while beautiful, it clings to every curve and is not always forgiving of flaws or bulges. Chiffon - This beautiful, light fabric is often used as an overlay on top of more substantial materials. This sheer, woven material has a weightless appearance and can add beauty and dimension to many styles of gowns. That being said, it is delicate and can snag easily. Organza - Like chiffon, this is a delicate, sheer, woven fabric usually made from silk. However, while still lightweight, it is stiffer and more structured than chiffon, making it ideal for weddings held in warmer weather. Tulle - This is a sheer fabric with an open weave that gives the appearance of netting. If you have ever seen a ballerina’s tutu, you have seen tulle. Easily snagged, tulle can give a ball gown-style dress a lighter-than-air feeling beyond compare. Lace - This beautiful, open weave fabric is usually used to form overlays and augmentations that make a dress even more stunning. Lace comes in different styles and varieties that include Chantilly, Venise and Alencon. In general lace wedding dresses impart a sense of luxury, tradition and style to virtually any bride on her special day. Style Considerations The material from which it is made is only one aspect that goes into the look of the dress you ultimately pick. There are several other stylistic factors that enter into the equation. Length While floor-length gowns are the traditional choice, many ladies are deciding on shorter dresses. You can look gorgeous in anything from a mini dress that goes just below your hips to an option that falls just above your knee or, for those who are inspired by the fashion of the 1950s, a tea-length choice that hits below the knee. In addition to being more traditional, floor-length dresses are recommended for the bride who wants to draw attention to the lower part of her body because of her beautiful skirt. These skirts can fall into several categories: Ball gown skirt - This full skirt is ideal for formal dresses and particularly suits brides who have pear-shaped or slender figures. Straight or sheath skirt - While this style can constrict your movement during activities such as dancing, many lean-figured or petite brides choose it for its elongating effect and its tendency to accentuate every curve. Trumpet skirt - This style begins to flare at about mid-thigh, reminiscent of the shape of a trumpet’s bell. It is more understated than the mermaid skirt described below. Mermaid skirt - To pull this style off, the wearer must be very comfortable in her skin since it shows off every curve. The mermaid style hugs the bodice and comes straight down to the knee, at which point it flares dramatically. A-line dress - Also fitted around the bodice, this style then flows to the ground in a shape similar to that of an uppercase A. Excellent for virtually all body types and formal and informal wedding styles, the A-line gives brides a great deal of versatility that allows them to accentuate their best features while minimizing their cosmetic challenges. The Back If you’re proud of your back and want to show it off, a backless dress will give you the perfect opportunity. You can choose among a variety of necklines that accentuate your back including halter, sweetheart, keyhole, cross-back, strapless and thin strap. On the other hand, you might feel more comfortable covering your back. The good news is that you can do so in many beautiful ways that accentuate your grace and poise as you walk down the aisle and dance with your new husband during your reception. Your options include covering your back with lace, sewing on beads, crystals, pearls or flower appliqué to a nude fabric or choosing a dress whose back buttons down from the neckline to your hips. The Sleeves Perhaps you want to show off your arms, or maybe they are a feature you would rather leave to the imaginations of your guests on your wedding day. Whatever your preference, there is a sleeve style that will suit you. These include: Long sleeves, including straight sheath and bishop or peasant-style that end at the wrist and have a tight-fitting cuff. 3/4 tight-fitting sheath or raglan sleeves or loose kimono or bell styles. Strapless styles that accentuate shoulders and bust line. Cap sleeves that only cover the shoulder. Juliette sleeves that are longer than cap sleeves. With a puff at the shoulder, they are tight to the wrists. Boatneck sleeves. Off-the-shoulder sleeves. The Waistline There are several waistline styles designed to flatter virtually any figure. They include: Empire waistline. This is raised and comes just below the breasts. Well-suited to most body types, it works especially well for small-busted brides who want to accentuate their neckline. Since the dress flows from the bustline, it can hide other imperfections such as a pear-shaped figure. Natural waistline. This falls above the navel and the hip bones. A dropped waistline can be created by placing a belt below the natural waistline. When You Have Found Just the Right Dress After days, weeks or maybe months of researching and searching, you believe you have at last found the wedding dress of your dreams. It looks great on you, it fits into your budget and your friends even seem happy. Now that you’re ready to make that all-important purchase, keep the following advice in mind: Don’t give into impulse. It has taken you this long to choose; you can afford to sleep on it for just a little while longer. Taking this extra time will cement your decision in your mind and help to ensure that you are not a victim of pressure or anxiety in your decision-making. Choose the right size. Maybe you will actually succeed in dropping 30 pounds before the ceremony, but don’t base your size choice on what might or might not happen. Remember, it’s always easier to take in a dress than it is to let it out. For that reason, we recommend that you size your dress according to your largest measurement. If your hips are a size 14, for example, you should order your dress in that size, making alterations later where necessary. Pay attention to what you sign. Your contract is a crucial document that outlines what you will need to know about your dress, including when it will be shipped, the payment agreement and any additional fees. Keep it in a safe place for reference after you sign it, and be sure you pay for your dress in a way you can trace such as via credit card or check. While You Wait It’s like anticipating Christmas or your birthday when you were a child. Waiting for your dress to come in can definitely keep you on pins and needles for weeks. While you’re enduring this period of suspended animation, take the following advice to stay sane: If you were allowed to take pictures of your dress when you tried it on in the store, put them in an album. Show them to people you trust, explaining what it was about that particular gown that made it The Dress. Listing the dress’s qualities can help to assuage any doubts or buyer’s remorse you might be feeling as you wait for its arrival. Under no circumstances should you try on any more dresses. You have taken numerous steps to ensure that you made the decision that was right for you. Don’t second guess yourself. If you have doubts or questions, talk to the supportive friends who went shopping with you on the fateful day when you picked your wedding dress. They can remind you of details you may have forgotten and reassure you about the wisdom of your choice. Don’t panic. If you have doubts about a particular aspect of your dress, wait until it is shipped to the store. Many flaws and imperfections can be expertly addressed during the alteration process. Finally, there is one piece of wisdom that frequently gets lost during the hustle and bustle of wedding preparation: Have fun. Remember, all of this – the dress, the flowers, reception, music, etc. – are important. At the same time, they represent only a tiny fraction of the real reason for the day. No matter what might go right or wrong, you and the love of your life will be linking your destinies in a ceremony taking place in front of the people you love most. While mistakes and glitches may well occur, they will not most likely be what you remember years from now when recounting the story of your wedding day. We hope that these ideas and suggestions help to make your special day stand out even more.